Of Manila, the Inland Empire, Irvine.
Daughter. Sister. Niece. Granddaughter.
Ex-girlfriend. Youth? Sorority sister? Friend?
FACTS:
a fan of organization/making meaning of what's in front of me
living at home, which is maddening--freedom is nothing here
unable to keep up with expectations--familial, school, social, christian, life, etc.
finding it hard to keep up the charade I am currently afflicted by (which is often recognizable by the facade of naiveté to excuse my shortcomings)
grieving the loss of an important individual, JCC, and finding it more evident day after day how much I miss him
surrounded by acquaintances while lacking true friends
SPECULATIONS:
going to hell
going to fail
going to keep trying
not going to change because I'm afraid of what I don't know
psychologically fixed on the belief that I will live life alone and unhappily
convinced no one of import will find this and if by chance they do, they will not attempt to temper my non-resilient ego.
Fin.
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