Awake, you anxious coward!

Do not be anxious about anything, 

but in everything, 

by prayer and petition, 

with thanksgiving, 

present your requests to God.

—Philippians 4:6 

I'm feeling anxious :( and it might have something to do with the chem online homework, formal lab report, poster project, final exam, the 2 vanilla chai lattes I drank, the ever-unsettling feeling of not having a career and the fear that lingers while unsuccessfully trying to pursue one, the depressing lack of self-confidence due to poor performance in several aspects of culturally defined import, the pathetic quest I call "chasing the wind," the unfinished business of unrequited "love," the sloppy self-esteem I've managed to piece together, failing to meet the expectations of people I love, and not being strong enough to go where God calls. Yes, my name is Joyce; I'm anxious and I'm in the danger zone.

\\edit/addition: Ecclesiastes 2:10-11¹⁰ I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;    I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my labor,    and this was the reward for all my toil. ¹¹ Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done    and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;    nothing was gained under the sun.