You text me and expect me to talk to you?

"Just wanted to deeply apologize to you if it seems like I've forgotten about paying amendments. I've read your note. The debt has been on my mind and heavy on my heart since the last we've spoken. Please respond to me in how I can resolve this such as payments, etc"
Dec 8, 10:26 pm

You take and take, ask and ask, but you don't know how much the idea of talking to you (through text or otherwise) is such a hard idea for me to grasp. I can't talk to you. I'm too hurt. 

How easy is it for me to stand in front of you for a conversation? How easy is it for me to pick up my phone and dial your number to talk to you indirectly? How easy is it to even type to you on the same keys I used to type "gn sd ily" on? NO, no, no NO!! This is definitely not easy. I can't talk to you now, or anytime soon. Take my response of silence AS a response. 

Everyday since you've hurt me I've felt like my entire being is being put under a rolling pin. Everything is meshing together, changing constantly, and I can't find my footing. No, I'm not ready. 

And for your information, repayment was not the issue—it was the principle of integrity, of accountability, of trustworthiness. I can't accept anything from you.. especially if you TEXT IT. As Miley Cyrus said, "what I need to hear now//your sincere apology//when you mean it, I'll believe it//if you text it, I'll delete it."

In short, there's nothing you can do and there's nothing you can add to fix this. LET IT weigh heavy on your heart. Carry this burden with you. Pray about it. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Don't be the selfish person I knew you to be. Grow from this. Strengthen your character. If what we shared was going to mean anything, let it be the a story of how you learned a lesson in maturity, in honesty, in true integrity.