i don't want to be a monster anymore.

i don't want to be a loser anymore.
i'm getting tired of always getting the short end of the stick.
time for change.
time to try something new.
time to stop making this about me.
time to give up on me.
time to fight for what matters.
time to figure life out.

i am literally sick of this. i feel ill and am ailing in depression, loneliness, and invisible torture. it's terribly agonizing—this mental anguish, this sour, pitiful, disgusting, circus of self-destructive thoughts. i'm not okay and that's not okay.